Time for an update!
Mar. 2nd, 2014 12:57 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
avalon_stormI have not updated for a long time, even longer on Dreamwidth but this time, at least, I remembered to post there and it updates Livejournal automagically. Actually not for a year, publically anyway! Eek! Well let me see. Also you can share with me on Pinterest if you want, I am still not great at updating but it is faster. =)
So let me see, what happened this year.
Breaking up with Llew and staying with David, I have had the same learning at different angles which is that if you only present one side of yourself because that is the side that works best in a relationship, either your other side gets inaccessible in that relationship which makes responding to things as a whole person hard, or it comes roaring out and the other person doesn't necessarily like it. Because we are multiple people do spend time and energy kind of...not necessarily fitting in, in that they generally like to be there or do whatever, but kind of sorting through different people's responses to see whose will have prominence? I don't know if that makes sense and it is probably overstated. But anyways I do it too, because I am me, and I have this connection with Lynn, and I am a death lord and part of a multiple system, and I am finding my way to do it less.
Work is a lot of hours of the day and what you do every day does really change how your days are, at least for us where we cannot seem to do a lot of things without caring about them. Our work has had a lot of highs and some lows and it is probably going to stay that way, and that leaves less energy for other risks like writing or inviting new friends into our lives. I think it is okay but it is something I think an eye needs to be kept on. You know that thing not to love something that doesn't love you back? Work comes close to that sometimes. Although it also gives us amazing chances to stretch and grow, too.
I am coming to terms with really being stuck in a 43 year old body and life, and sometimes it does make me feel sad. Other people remember times before we had body children (whom I love to bits, and I love to take on adventures or tidy up their rooms with them) and although I do not want to rush the kids growing up, I am a little sad I missed that time. The things that I love most to do are see new things, and right now there is not so much money and time for it. I am super lucky that our job may provide some, but I also am trying to figure out how to save some money so I can choose some things in the future when the time opens up. This spring and summer in particular I want to bring the boys with me when I can to see things, although we have just made some choices that make those days a little harder to plan and find.
Finally, I saw Jerusalem in IMAX this week and it was amazing! I loved the whole thing from the beautiful, beautiful cinematography to the stories of the three young women (and I met them! For real!). It was an overview of the history and culture with some heart to it, not super in depth but immersive, so you did not care about the depth. It would be great for kids starting around 8. Also now I am wild to go there, and it would be best to go with our family and David's....I mean he is Jewish. =)
I hope everyone is well, if you are reading this comment and say hello!
So let me see, what happened this year.
- I turned 16 in July (2013) with a birthday party online, and everyone came pretty much and it was the best fun. I am not sure I will be aging this year, we'll see.
- I broke up with Llew...I felt like he did not like me enough of the time. He has found someone more suited to him, and I am happy for him.
- David and I worked things out so we are still together.
- I started dating someone else as well, Trip, who is lovely. He is not really multiple, and he lives in California, I met him through David's system. He is super smart and funny and warm.
- I also started dating Sean, in David's system. Sean is fierce and direct and insightful.
- Yes my dating life is kind of full, especially including Carl and I am super lucky everyone puts up with scheduling and things.
- Our new job was really hard to adjust to, one of the biggest adjustments everyone said ever. It must have gone okay because they promoted us, although that kind of puts us more visible which is a bit scary sometimes. Still, I am glad, it was a strong lesson in working hard even when you are feeling uncertain.
- We went to Farthing Party in Montreal and that was really, really fun. I am going to Ad Astra in April, well at least my mother is, so if you are going let me know, we can meet up. My father will be there too, which will be hard. He mostly does not approve of me I think.
- Work and family/kids and friends has taken up a lot of the time, and we are working out more. I have had to take my experiences where they have come, I have not had quite as much time to go out to art galleries and things like that, and not as much travel. As our youngest son (outside) gets older I think that will shift but oh, I miss that year we had more time. Although we do need the money and work is fun.
Breaking up with Llew and staying with David, I have had the same learning at different angles which is that if you only present one side of yourself because that is the side that works best in a relationship, either your other side gets inaccessible in that relationship which makes responding to things as a whole person hard, or it comes roaring out and the other person doesn't necessarily like it. Because we are multiple people do spend time and energy kind of...not necessarily fitting in, in that they generally like to be there or do whatever, but kind of sorting through different people's responses to see whose will have prominence? I don't know if that makes sense and it is probably overstated. But anyways I do it too, because I am me, and I have this connection with Lynn, and I am a death lord and part of a multiple system, and I am finding my way to do it less.
Work is a lot of hours of the day and what you do every day does really change how your days are, at least for us where we cannot seem to do a lot of things without caring about them. Our work has had a lot of highs and some lows and it is probably going to stay that way, and that leaves less energy for other risks like writing or inviting new friends into our lives. I think it is okay but it is something I think an eye needs to be kept on. You know that thing not to love something that doesn't love you back? Work comes close to that sometimes. Although it also gives us amazing chances to stretch and grow, too.
I am coming to terms with really being stuck in a 43 year old body and life, and sometimes it does make me feel sad. Other people remember times before we had body children (whom I love to bits, and I love to take on adventures or tidy up their rooms with them) and although I do not want to rush the kids growing up, I am a little sad I missed that time. The things that I love most to do are see new things, and right now there is not so much money and time for it. I am super lucky that our job may provide some, but I also am trying to figure out how to save some money so I can choose some things in the future when the time opens up. This spring and summer in particular I want to bring the boys with me when I can to see things, although we have just made some choices that make those days a little harder to plan and find.
Finally, I saw Jerusalem in IMAX this week and it was amazing! I loved the whole thing from the beautiful, beautiful cinematography to the stories of the three young women (and I met them! For real!). It was an overview of the history and culture with some heart to it, not super in depth but immersive, so you did not care about the depth. It would be great for kids starting around 8. Also now I am wild to go there, and it would be best to go with our family and David's....I mean he is Jewish. =)
I hope everyone is well, if you are reading this comment and say hello!
